Reframing Foreplay: Tips for a More Sensuous Experience
I really think we need to reframe how we think about foreplay. It tends to be seen as something we do only to get ready for the main course rather than as a pleasurable experience in itself. Not to mention, there's the misconception that foreplay is mostly for vulva owners, and while it's true that vulva owners need more foreplay to become fully aroused, penis owners have just as much to gain from it.
Similar to many other aspects of life, it appears that we now speed through sex in order to achieve the blissful orgasmic reward at the conclusion. But there is so much more pleasure to be enjoyed when we take our time and engage in sensuous foreplay, which, as you well know, is the fundamental purpose of sex!
My top tips for better foreplay:
1. Foreplay should be approached with curiosity and a desire to learn more about your partner. With this mentality, you can make it an enjoyable exploration you go on together and lessen the pressure to perform well. Each of you will have both things you love and things you dislike, and that's absolutely fine!
2. Start by exploring the other parts of the body while concentrating on non-genital contact. There are so many places in our bodies where we might experience sexual pleasure, but they frequently go unnoticed. You come across some previously undiscovered erogenous hotspots!
3. To increase arousal and feeling, use all of your senses. We can make an experience far more dramatic and immersive by appealing to all five senses. You may try using cozy lube, whispering in each other's ears, listening to a sensual soundtrack, or even looking in the mirror.
4. Spend some money on new sexy lingerie or couple's vibrators to explore a wider spectrum of sensations. When used softly on various locations, spanking implements like floggers or spanking paddles, as well as vibrators or clitoral suction toys, can feel terrific. The secret is to explore and discover what works for you!
5. Rekindle your love for kissing, and not just on the lips! You can apply those skills everywhere on the body when kissing, including the neck, the small of the back, the inner thighs, and even during oral sex. Kissing is a terrific technique to create anticipation.
The greatest method to become pros at pleasing each other is to have an ongoing, open dialogue about sex so that you both feel more comfortable revealing what you enjoy and don't like. Ask your partner how they prefer to be touched, whether they prefer it to be faster, slower, harder, or gentler – these are fantastic topics for dirty talk!